Svett

I am pushing the envelope, which is to say attempting a sewing project. Today I started the cloth advent calendar that I want to make for E, and initially I though "how hard can it be?" I think that about all sewing projects. Usually that gets me through the cutting phase, and then the thought of setting up the sewing machine is usually too overwhelming, so I just let the project lie dormant until I throw it away five or ten years later. Or else I do actually try to sew, and it always ends up sloppy and disappointing.

But I'm really motivated on this one, because I'm hoping that it can be a little anchor point in a few chaotic weeks, maybe just as much for me as for E. I've been casing the local quilt stores to see what they have, and today I went in for the kill. I was a nervous wreck. I actually produced that rank sweat that only nervousness brings forth. My brain froze up, and I just couldn't envision the way the fabrics would go together at all. It was really weird, as I usually have pretty clear notions of what I'm after aesthetically when it comes to yarn, paint, and even clothes. I finally had to have an employee talk me through my nerves. You could tell she thought I was an idiot, but I'm trying to suppress the memory of that.

After an eternity of looking through the greens and reds and Christmas prints I finally came up with a combination and brought it up to the counter to be cut. I was all dithery and wondered aloud if they would go together. With great comic timing she looked blankly at me and said "They're all green and red. Of course they go together." Argh. I felt even more moronic. But really, all the greens and reds don't necessarily go together.

So, I spent some time this afternoon while E was at preschool cutting out 24 little Christmas stockings. It was a mentally and emotionally exhausting experience. After E went to bed I hunkered down in front of the tv with the old rillejakke project. Ah, what comfort to knit and watch bad tv (House and Fringe for those who must know)...